[deeply absorbed in thought; perplexed by conflicting situations or statements; filled with bewilderment]
This blog has been moved!You should be automatically redirected. If not, visit http://www.thebemusedphotog.com and update your bookmarks.
Baby Talk
Thursday, August 31, 2006
The 大姐 notified the family that she'd made reservations for dinner for eight... Couldn't figure how we were eight... Until i saw the 二姐's ever-growing tummy and i figured the eighth had to be baby Stella...
Stella's certainly throwing her weight around now... the li'l 5 month old fetus... and she hasn't even learnt to kick yet!
The profile of the 二姐 has doubled and she looks positively laden down... even i started to worry about the safety of the petite 二姐... but i learnt to stop it real quick... when i warned said sister about a pathetic little step at the entrance, she threw me a dirty look... *opps*
Totally freaked out when i heard from the Mother that the 二姐 started listening to classical music on 92.4Fm, for at least an hour a day... say what?? the 二姐 is the last person i'd expect to believe in the old wives' tales about how babies get smarter listening to Mozart (that's from the Incredibles...)
i mean, my sis is cool... she listens to the good stuff like Kings of Convenience and Jason Mraz... and the brother-in-law listens to alternative rock... now they're inundating innocent Stella with Mozart??
thank goodness the Mother was only exaggerating...
Sure, they really fell for the whole Mozart-is-proven-to-make-babies-smarter thing and bought a 4CD set of Mozart's Symphonies... Each CD is for a different stage in baby's life (like seriously??)... And the 二姐 was all Mozart isn't too bad...
But, thankfully, Stella also listens to soft rock and Kings so she's gonna be one cool baby... (And i can tell you that when she turns out to be real smart, it's not gonna be because of Mozart... It's because both her parents are already smart... She can't go wrong getting her genes from either parent... They're both GEP...)
i did learn something totally annoying though:
When the preggie sister saw me today, she commented on the top i was wearing...(And I happen to really love this top... Thought it looked good on me...)
Hey I tried on your top. My top? Yea, I saw it on sale at the shop. But I didn't buy it. (it was so not on sale when i bought it... grrr) So it didn't fit? No. It fit. It fit? You and Stella? (i stare incredulously at the tummy) It fit. Me and Baby. But I didn't look nice in it so I didn't buy it...
MY TOP can fit the sister AND the baby... And even she didn't buy it...
Either I'm all set to becoming a premature yummy mummy or I had better start changing my dressing style...
Boliao (or bored) people do weird things when they don't have a job...
Like figuring out how to make silly photo collages out of even sillier pictures with Picasa... Rule of Thumb: Never sleep on the bus when the camera is around...Unless you are posing and you want your sleeping pose taken...like said sleeping person in above pictures...
i was still relishing the good day i had when my dad dropped the bomb...
we're repainting the house. you'll have to tidy the loft.
TIDY... the... LOFT...????
it's not that i'm incapable of doing household chores (contrary to popular belief)... i lived on my own in Dhaka 6 months... I was a hostelite for 2years... I can wash and clean... And I know how to use a vacuum cleaner and an iron...
it's just... the LOFT... as of 0000hrs 30 Aug 2006 ... that little empty space on the blue carpet? that's where I sit...
the LOFT is my little haven at home... the attic... the mezzanine... whatever you like to call it... and it's always in the state of organized chaos... it's intuitive... and i never lose anything...
love the power of the irony... If i gave you everything you asked for, where would you put it? - God
been talking about tidying it up for the past 1 year... but i never got round to actually doing it... cos seriously... i can never find anything when everything is hidden away in shelves!!
and now, i have to tidy it all up... pack ALL my things into eeky little boxes... and hide them all away before the painters come round MONDAY and sprinkle white snowflake stains over everything in sight...
It's the cool, legal, modern day drug... Yet, i understood so little about it... I had to go find out...
These were some of the stuff that caught my eye, according to HowStuffWorks:
- Caffeine is an addictive drug. It operates using the same mechanisms that amphetamines, cocaine, and heroin use to stimulate the brain. On a spectrum, caffeine's effects are more mild than amphetamines, cocaine and heroin, but it is manipulating the same channels, and that is one of the things that gives caffeine its addictive qualities. If you feel like you cannot function without it and must consume it every day, then you are addicted to caffeine. i'm quite sure i know someone who fits the bill...
- Medically, caffeine is useful as a cardiac stimulant and also as a mild diuretic (it increases urine production). now, that's why kay always needs to use the toilet...
- Recreationally, it is used to provide a "boost of energy" or a feeling of heightened alertness. It's often used to stay awake longer... normally i'd agree with that... but not today...
before coffee after coffee didn't only happen to him... but i prefer to protect the identities of the ladies...
and you know what's most frustrating? after i typed all this, i discover that kay already blogged this years ago... argh!
it's one thing to have no job... and quite another to have one's mother talk to one about it...
got me a little upset... and she realized and stopped (which is rather nice)...
so how does one deal with one's own joblessness?
- start promising friends and family that one is seriously looking for a job and sending out resumes - attempt to keep to said promise - stop feeble attempt and meet a friend from bangladesh for coffee, on the day that he is to fly off - listen to music (i really did try to lay off the moody stuff...) - get honest advice over supper from friend who is already disillusioned about work - watch an inspirational video
i know... it sounds like i'm reacting to a comment i got from some persons about my being a spoilt brat... spending my daddy's money and all that... no la... i know i'm a spoilt brat... haha!!
sure it's great to be bumming around... meeting friends... movies... shopping... shopping... shopping... and still shopping... i'm having a really good time... like having school holidays... the cell almost always rolls their eyes at me when i talk about my week...
but i really miss having things to do... constructive things...
yesterday and today, i helped to take photos for a project in church... it's kind of an imitation of the 4 millions smiles Singapore was doing... they're setting up a photowall in church and i was roped in to be a roving photographer... (no photos yet cos the copyright dun belong to me...will wait till they release me a copy...)
was really tiring... but i had a lot of fun! got a chance to visit the lavender branch of church... played with some of the children... carried cute little 2.5mth Ryan... and chatted with a couple of ignyte girls... they even shared chips with me!!
looking thru all the pictures really makes me smile... and i suddenly realized how much i missed working on things...
like, even back in school, no matter how much i hated the theory classes... there was always the good stuff to look forward to... my practical work... like broadcast journ, BAV, radio, desktop, web design, photojourn & APJ, FYP, & drama classes... things that i loved doing, and could see the result of...
i felt constructive then... useful even... and this holidaying around is gonna get boring soon...
was never one to sit still... i'm not the kind of girl who can foresee herself being a tai tai... i imagine i'd love it for about a month... then get really sick and bored... i need to have things to do... new things to constantly keep me occupied...
and so, i'm finally inspired to get my act together and start finding a job... hope i'll send out my first resume by monday...
today in cell, cass described me as a hum bao bao or cry baby... and she didn't even know half the story... i very nearly cried watching this movie... so 没有用 right? at least i didn't cry...
nearly... but didn't...
this place is dusty... *sniff sniff*
I organised an outing to watch this movie because of the promise i made to Miss Lou... She's a big fan of soppy love stories... Miss Ha & Kay came along as well...
The Lake House (see pictures)was an adaptation from "Il Mare"... The Korean film I watched with the Nightbirds (man, that was how long ago??) over at Mark's place... I remember Mark fell asleep while Ivan & I watched, captivated... it's about a man and a woman who are living two years apart, and by a stroke of the miraculous (clemmie says we can't use the word luck...), they are able to communicate with each other via the letter box at the Lake House... mind you, it's faster than email... you can even send bulky items! size is limited to what fits in the letter box though... and as all love stories go... they fall in love... and do fun things together... like take walks... 2 years apart... and they share the same dog...
The way the director tied the car accident to the entire story was much tighter than Il Mare... The ending, the way I thought Il Mare should have ended... And it was really beautiful, the sunset scenes and the arty shots like the revolving door... The two characters were more intimate in this version too... Also pretty cute that the restaurant that the characters met at was called Il Mare... And how could i forget the chemistry between Keanu Reeves & Sandra Bullock? It's a pity they're getting old...
But if i had to choose between Il Mare and Lake House? I couldn't... I still love the house in Il Mare better... It was way prettier... The mood was very different, the soundtrack was gorgeous... And Lee Jung Jae was really cute... A lot of interesting stuff was left out in Lake House too... like how the guy saved wine for her... how he built a house for her... how she gave him fish in the letter box... (see review of Il Mare)
The plots were essentially the same... but each with it's unique bits... I guess, I just can't help enjoying these silly stars & aeroplanes flicks... (Did I mention I'm a huge Sandra Bullock fan? After while you were sleeping...) I'm so planning to get this VCD...
"...You can dance, you can jive, having the time of your life See that girl, watch that scene, dig in the shopping queen..."
i really am spending beyond my means... but of cos, that statement isn't really fair cos my means are nothing... zilch... so as long as i spend something... like pay 50cts to go to the toilet or 20cts for a packet of standard 2ply tissue, i have just spent beyond my means...
ok... that's the excuse for shopping...
at least i buy useful items... is my defence...
got the Lowepro Nova 5 AW camera bag... it opens the sensible way... it's got all the space i need to put my camera, lenses, accessories and other peripherals that i always think are so essential for my assignment... like umbrella, water bottle, makeup kit (oh opps, i dun even use makeup), and bling! it is that spacious and roomy... it's huge though, and boxy... and i look puny carrying it... But, when i walked into combined L cell today with it, everyone thought i'd started working as a photog already... I LOVE IT!
i also bought the Kingston 512MB DDR2 RAM from Sim Lim... Kay helped me pick it out... (I couldn't even figure out the tiny print price lists in all the shops... Much less find the specifications of the RAM i needed... Kay had to demonstrate the wonders of CPU-Z) First time i saw my dear lappie taken apart... i think she must have felt naked when they took the keyboard out to install the RAM... (say, i never even knew my keyboard could open up... heck, i couldn't even take out my battery on my own...) in any case, i think the comp is running faster now... and i have no excuse but to get to work on the video editing for Alphatrack... uh oh...
now, that's two items struck off the shopping list... a zillion more to go...
met a fren today... initials of said fren - NY... Hence the title...
First things first Did the sensible thing... ... bought the mr brown tur kua tee shirt... for $20... in smallest size which is still too big for me... and the printing wasn't very good...
Sakae Sushi Lunch... tried the baigai... expected something like escargot... turned out to be raw & smelly snails... had to dunk it in the hot water for the green tea before i could eat the second... ugh... and NY never took a single one...
spent lunchtime discussing the perils of working in the local media... him i mean... not me... i'm still jobless... NY plans to wear the tur kua tee to work... i gave him all my blessing... also silently promising to write when they exile him... i doubt he'd even get internet access then...
Shopping... NY was wearing a cool shirt... i lost my phone number... can i borrow yours?
He showed me where to get more of those... (got a personal shopper assignment coming up... gotta do my homework... )
found a cool shirt at Fox Men... didn't fit... took a photo of it anyway... why would a guy wear a shirt that says "you are NOT staying over"??
Borders Bistro finally sat down for a drink. I treated him to a pathetic $4.80+++ latte... He's cheap that way... too lazy to recall what we said anymore... it wasn't important anyway...
Was watching a stars & aeroplanes show on Star Movies with Zaid & his Mom @ their Royal Plaza hotel room...
This guy ran back to the girl and spoke about the fight they had the day before... The girl thought that it was over between them... Then the guy explained why he came back...
"I'd rather fight with you than make love to anyone else"
awww....
more details about the show? don't know... don't care... only watched the last 10 mins...
For the Guitarists: Because Of You Chords, Tabbed by GuitarLearner Taken from UltimateGuitar.Com
Intro: Fm, Db, Eb, Fm,Db,Eb
Ab Cm FmM7 Fm I will not make the same mistakes that you-u did Eb Ab Cm I-i-i will not let myself FmM7 Fm Eb Cause my heart so much misery Ab Cm FmM7 I will no-ot break the way you did, Fm Eb You fell so-o hard Ab Cm I've learned the hard wa-a-ay FmM7 Fm Eb Ebsus4 To never let it get that far
CHORUS: Eb Fm Because of you Db Eb Ebsus4 I never stray too far from the si-idewalk Eb Fm Because of you Db Eb C I learned to play on the safe side so I do-on't get hurt Bbm Because of you Ab/C I find it hard to tru-st Eb C7 Not only me, but everyo-one aro-und me Db7 Because of you-u-u-u-u Eb I am afra-aid
Ab Cm I lose my way Fm Eb And it's not too long befo-ore you point it out Ab Cm I cannot cry Fm Eb Because you know that's weakness in your eyes Ab Cm I'm forced to fa-ake Fm A smile, A laugh Fm Eb Ab ev-eryday of my life Cm My heart can't possibly bre-e-eak Fm Eb Ebsus4 When it wasn't even whole to sta-art with
CHORUS
Bridge Cm I watched you die Fm Eb I heard you cry every night in yo-ur sleep Eb Cm I was so-o young Fm Eb You should have known better than to lean on me Eb Cm Fm You never thought of anyone else Eb You just saw your pain Ebsus4 Cm Fm And now I cry in the middle of the night Eb For the same damn thing
Extended Chorus Eb Fm Because of you Db Eb I never stray too far from the si-idewalk Fm Because of you Db Eb N.C. I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hur----t Key Change to Gm Gm Becau-u-use of you Eb F I try my hardest ju-st to forget e-everything Gm Becau-use of you Eb F D7 I don't know how to let an-nyone el-lse in Cm Because of you Bb/D F D7 I'm ashamed of my li-i-ife because it's em-pty Eb Because of you F I am afraid
finally decided to take a bunch of tests to see exactly how nerdy or stupid I am... And the results were terribly unsatisfactory...
"Your nerdiness is: Not nerdy, but definitely not hip."
what??? "You are kinda smart. Many have done better, but you did much better than half the other test-takers." sure... try to make me feel better after you tell me that...
fine... so i'm not a nerd and i'm not stupid... i'm a cool geek... and that don't need no test...*pffft*
i'm beginning to like this bumming life... back in school, i was never this conscientious about catching plays or arthouse films, even though i liked them both... Many reasons... Too busy... Too lazy... And not many people would watch with me... The only time I could drag myself down to the theatre from ulu NTU was to watch a play and fulfill my requirements for theatre classes... That, or when my sisters buy the tickets for me and i watch with them...
Now? I catch a play and a documentary film all in one day... without a class assignment attached to either... Paul Rae will be so proud of me... (ok, so it's cos I managed to find Kay to watch with me and buy the tickets for me... and also cos he got complimentary tix for the film...)
Price: $0.00 1st Shot - Second Link by Wild Rice
I paid 40bucks to watch it... check out the ticket stubby
Between the first and second halves of the play, I liked the second half better...
Not that i dun like the acting of the malaysian cast, in fact i love the tall actor... Can't figure what his name is yet. But seriously, why do local writers always have to put a lot of vulgarities into their writing? like no serious writing or playscript is complete without a couple of f-words thrown in for good measure... Oh and not to mention the generous serving of sexual innuendoes...
In any case, those aren't even the main reason i liked the second half better... I think the pacing of the first half was a little long drawn... the second half was so much faster... each performance was about 2 mins... and each story was funny by itself... the acting was very animated too... perfect for the Singaporean with the short attention spans...
As such, Kay & I decided that Singaporean writers should just quit their jobs and go become actors... hope i dun get sued for saying that...
It talked about the internal unrest and unforgiveness as a result of the massacres and the brutality of the militia. It's sad how difficult reconciliation can be, and yet, it's probably gonna be one of the essential elements to keeping the peace and the independence...
The scenes were beautiful... The conversations really amusing... The story very moving... When the entire village was commemorating the deaths of those who were killed for supporting independence, people wailed before the tombs of their loved ones... I wanted to cry too...
I'm rather inspired by it... Kay thinks I could do this next time... We'll see how it goes... And like I said to him, " let me start my career in journalism first..."
the mother heads off to the market with the car, leaving me with no means of transport to get to my boccia practice... the boccia volunteer kaki is determined to get to practice by public transport... so we both check streetdirectory.com. she finds she's gotta take a train down to bukit panjang (which is already really far)... but what do i find???
Sorry there is no Bus Service available for this route. Perhaps you might want to consider taking other forms of transportation e. g Taxi, MRT or Drive There.
i mean... besides the fact that i'm not that ugly...
I like to think of myself as a very private person... I don't believe in best friends cos it seems annoying to be telling everything to just one person... I reveal bits about myself at will, catering to the audience, so that each person only gets the bits that are most relevant to that person... Or just the bits that i feel safe sharing about... That's why i account to a few people... So togther, they have the whole picture... (t'was my mama made me think about this...)
Rhinos have a symbiotic relationship with the oxpecker... They work together, each benefiting from the relationship. Oxpeckers land on the rhinos and eat ticks and other parasites that live on their skin. The oxpeckers get food and the beasts get pest control. It's a win-win thing...
If I were a rhino though, think i'd be pretty pissed...
I couldn't live my life knowing there was something else that always sits on my back, watching everything I do... I couldn't be myself, I couldn't be real, I couldn't be free... I'd feel the oxpecker was intruding on my personal space and time... And find it a complete nuisance... In between getting the itchy ticks eaten off my back, I'd be yelling at the oxpecker and telling it to just "get lost"...
So a friend of mine comes over and we finally get to watch Be With Me on DVD...
and either the weather was too hot or the movie was just unbearably long... cos the both of us were trying to stay awake watching it...
i mean, we both love arthouse films and all that... (it's really annoying to watch arthouse films with people who don't get it... trust me... don't even try...) but for most of the movie, i just didn't know what Eric Khoo was thinking!
The movie itself was visually stunning... the still shots were very intense and well composed... I absolutely love the story of Theresa Chan... Even dig the way she speaks her short lines... But but but... why the other few stories??
It seems almost disjointed to have a non-fiction story sandwiched between 3 obviously fictitious stories... like blasphemy... and why are the other stories so bad? could be the acting (the girls never look like they are truly in love)... could be the bizarre twists (i.e. the guy who gets killed by the girl who jumps off the building.)... could also be the contrived ghost story (the friend was already second guessing that Eric Khoo pulled another 12 storeys)
so all in all, we spent the entire duration of the movie, applauding Adrian Tan (DOP) for his beautiful shots, and screaming at Eric Khoo to decide between making a documentary or a provocative fictional film... Instead of trying to do both...
4:30 was slightly different i loved the story... it was completely fiction... you can tell... and it gets the point across... and once again... kudos to the DOP Lim Ching Leong... Beautiful shots...
but some of the stills were really really long... I understand the concept of the pregnant pauses... but i think 4:30 overused it to the point where the power of each pause becomes weakened... the friend believed it was the Eric Khoo influence... again...
One of the trackers emailed this to the entire team... I liked it so much I decided to put it in here...
Dear sisters & brothers
Please take a moment to relax your mind and humble your heart to focus on Christ. Allow God to be the only person on your mind .
Dear Lord,
I thank you for this day. I thank You for my being able to see and to hear this morning.
I'm blessed because You are a forgiving God and an understanding God. You have done so much for me and You keep on blessing me.
Forgive me this day for everything I have done, said or thought that was not pleasing to you. I ask now for Your forgiveness.
Please keep me safe from all danger and harm.
Help me to start this day with a new attitude and plenty of gratitude.
Let me make the best of each and every day to clear my mind so that I can hear from You.
Please broaden my mind that I can accept all things. Let me not whine and whimper over things I have no control over.
Let me continue to see sin through God's eyes and acknowledge it as evil. And when I sin, let me repent, and confess with my mouth my wrongdoing, and receive the forgiveness of God.
And when this world closes in on me, let me remember Jesus' example – to slip away and find a quiet place to pray. It's the best response when I'm pushed beyond my limits. I know that when I can't pray, You listen to my heart.
Continue to use me to do Your will.
Continue to bless me that I may be a blessing to others.
Keep me strong that I may help the weak.
Keep me uplifted that I may have words of encouragement for others.
I pray for those who are lost and can't find their way.
I pray for those who are misjudged and misunderstood.
I pray for those who don't know You intimately.
I pray for those who will delete this without sharing it with others.
I pray for those who don't believe. But I thank you that I believe. I believe that God changes people and God changes things.
I pray for all my sisters and brothers. For each and every family member in their households.
I pray for peace, love and joy in their homes that they are out of debt and all their needs are met.
I pray that every eye that reads this knows there is no problem, circumstance, or situation greater than God. Every battle is in Your hands for You to fight.
I pray that these words be received into the hearts of every eye that sees them and every mouth that confesses them willingly.
had dinner @ Graze... celebrating the preggie sister's birthday...
she's huge now... looked a bit like she's gonna explode... come december, i'm gonna be the proud aunt to li'l baby stella... the sister and the hubby are going to manila next weekend... to enjoy themselves alone for the last time before stella arrives... apparently, she's got my name... cos stella is latin for star... (not that i'm named star, but you know, the xin always gets referred to as star)
back to the dinner...
food's nice... got the blue swimming crab linguini... same as chuan wee wee, (who happens to be a noodle person)... you can't quite see the crab... but it's there... sisters got the meat platter... preggie sis craved meat... mummy got vegetarian corn chowder...
our waiter was particularly nice... when the sisters and the brother-in-law couldn't decide on dessert... he was all good natured and went, "take all the time you need." Or maybe he was just amused by their conversation.. which went
"we've decided" "no we haven't" "i thought we'd decided" "not yet" "no we're not decided"
nice ambience... dim lights... quite amusing cos when the bill came, our waiter whipped out a mini maglite for the dad to check the receipt... made us wonder what else he kept in his pockets...
price was a little steep... couldn't remember the bill though... was too sleepy...
think the only awkward moment was before the food came... we sat at a 8 seater table... preggie sis sat with her hubby, other sister with chuan wee wee, the dad with the mum, then me and an empty seat... made me wonder, who are they trying to make me fill that seat with?
it sounds really cool, doesn't it... i'm really proud of it... Pastor says being a psalmist is being a person who worships God in all circumstances... Di & David Chng got this award... It's an honour really, to be in their league...
I know God's been moving in my life and helping me realize my gifting in guitar... He taught me to flow in ministry... He taught me to hear... but i didn't realize how obvious it had become until this conversation with kay.. All i did that day was play a song that Pastor told me to play... Just one song...
Kay says: the song you led today was... wow thebemusedphotog says: huh? Kay says: think made the room dusty[that means he teared] thebemusedphotog says: are you serious? Kay says: you din look around meh? thebemusedphotog says: nope Kay says: yah... and you've got a very nice voice when you sing like that thebemusedphotog says: how was it different? Kay says: got annointing perhaps.. haha but you've got a nice voice for such songs thebemusedphotog says: oh ok thanx Kay says: that's why can be worship leader thebemusedphotog says: that's why called psalmist And because I got the psalmist award, Di gave me my very own set of old hymn worship song chords... How cool is that?
nearly 3 months ago, i sent zaid off at the airport... the sudden loss of a friend made me really depressed because i didn't know what to do with myself... i knew i was at crossroads and i needed to find a job...
this song was playing on my mp3 player while i sat on the west bound train.
at cityhall, i got out of the train station. I started walking... i walked past raffles hotel... past my hui guan... went to my cheap CD shop at shaw towers... walked on... went down to arab street (because i'd never been there before) and just took photos... i saw the mosque there, the eateries, the small shops, and empty lots... 1 hour later... i arrived back at Bugis station and took the train home... the hour that i walked out on life...
i dunno why... but i felt a lot better after that... i didn't know any better what i was going to do with my life, but i just felt more alive... not being conventional... not being predictable... and if i can, i wanna do it again...
i was at the bugis area again today... with a friend this time... did the usual surfing at my favourite place... had some really good and cheap $2 carrot cake... talked about what it means to be GEP... and i thought of this...
on my way home in the bus, i was just staring out of the window and watching all the cars and trees rushing by... this song was playing in my creative zen nano... felt comfy and sleepy... and thoughtful... as i reflected on the happenings of the past few days, something inside me suddenly said, "把心收回吧。” *that's one of the lines of dialogue from 大长今*
it spoke to me about moving on, not falling back on the things that have happened, but to look ahead.
i'd seen so much, done so much, learnt so much on my missions trip. I met cancer stricken patients giving their lives to Jesus, a group of cheery and bubbly orphan girls who made you feel like they were your best friends. i made friends with uni students and youth who have so much energy and life and want to give it to Jesus.
And i've had a wonderful time getting to know my trackers better... late night 7eleven maggi mee, honey lemon, blogging at the cyber cafe, the girl talks, the inhouse coffee sessions with kinder bueno, 'what comes next?' at the art gallery cafe, xi shua shua and losing Q-zar to Kay for 3 nights...
Really had a lot of fun with Joy joy, my roomie for the 2 weeks... we'd chat late into the night... We talked about the track programmes, about our mommies, about the people we liked and didn't like, and then we'd do tawg together on the bed... Even the scary experience of waking up in the middle of the night to see her staring at me (she woke me up...) didn't quite deter us from being the best roomie friends around...
We won hands down the award for the messiest room in the entire track... we had clothes and bags shrewn all over the room, in every hole we could find, and even on the tv. Every time she apologised for not clearing up, we'd laugh and leave everything where it was. the only people who cleared up were the room service... and we could tell they were getting pretty frustrated with us... Q-zar used to be placed on the bed every day... after a while, they just left him on the floor...
"把心收回.."
i've to remember that the seasons are changing again... it's back to the real world, back to job search, back to my own home, my own life... learning to live my life with as much of Jesus in it as possible... without looking weird...
as much as i enjoyed what i did in the past 3 months, those times are coming to an end... for all the friends that i made in this time, i know they will always be friends... still, time changes everything...
i was starting to feel really happy again... really secure and safe... but i'm never sure anymore... could just be an illusion of some sort... a product of my own hyperactive sanctified imagination...
some people say women have a sixth sense about these things... mine got lost somewhere along with my ability to multitask...
i've seen how horribly hurt stars and aeroplanes can get when they collide by mistake...
a dear little star came up to me and said... "don't break up after track ok?" I nearly cried... she looked so sad... i wasn't the aeroplane, i was the proxy...
just seeing her makes this star not want to fall anymore...
As we were walking back to the hotel from da chong eating centre, joy joy came beside me and asked, "are you happy?"
my first response was to ask, "happy about what?"
but i stopped. she wasn't asking me for anything. she honestly wanted to know.
i started to think about my state of mind at that moment, and all the events that led up to that.
#1 - that morning, Reslie told us the joke about his wife, Mary, and his family name Lam. After they got married and had their first child, he sang to her, "Mary had a little Lam".
#2 - Melmel got to his head that my stuffed weirdo, Q-zar, looked like a snuffleupagus. But becos he's small, he should be called a snuffie. He wouldn't even acknowledge Q-zar's real name. I slapped a restraining order against him, then decided that Q-zar really is a snuffie. But that's his species and not his name...
#3 - just an hour before, i was having ma century egg porridge, taking some pictures of the trackers having dinner in the light of the setting sun, watching nice mtvs on ASTRO at the projection tv at da chong, and thinking about the story of the next film i would make if i had the time to.
it was a good day, and i was feeling happy... so i grinned and told her "yea, I'm happy."
i plan to ask as many people this question as i possibly can...
still no pictures... using my S$1/hr internet at the cyber cafe near my hotel... will talk more about the actual ministry stuff when the pictures are sorted...
finally got rid of my spate of bad fortune with the shops around here... got a nice cool tank top for Rm10 last night... *on offday, i spent the entire day at Midvalley and couldn't find a thing to buy... save for a useful chord book from MPH... and a Zara tee for kay (of all ppl)*
also realized that supermarkets are not exactly the most intuitive places to find what you need... went to buy logistics and somehow, the products are arranged in such weird manner that all your normal common sense gets thrown out the window... like the washing items are on the opposite ends of the store from the tupperwares and party needs (why??)... and the chips are far from the chocolates (such a hassle!!!)...
oh, and i'm hooked on daytona... beginner stage... learning to drift the car... haha!
anyway, cher saw a little toddler girl wearing the cutest teeshirt on the street... and she told me about it... we both agree that it's one of the best gifts our hubby could possibly give us...
it said "if you think i'm cute.... wait till you see my mom"
okok... going upstairs to eat maggi mee now... ballooned already so it really doesn't make a diff anymore... and in any case, i can't get as jialat as mel mel... he looks like he's 3 months preggers... like my sis!
